Review 5:Super Mario Bros. 2 (USA)

For my fifth game review, let's have a look at a Mario game. It wasn't as popular as the other 2 Mario games, but was still considered a classic. It wasn't originally a Mario game, but was still chosen and released in North America. What is it? It's Super Mario Bros. 2.







It was originally released as Doki Doki Panic in Japan, an entirely different game than the original SMB 2 game, which was considered too hard for America. Doki Doki had quite a bit of differences from the USA version, including the characters, the music, and the fact that you had to beat the game with every character before seeing the ending.





Gameplay:8/10





Due to the gameplay being completely ripped out of Doki Doki Panic, it was very different from other Mario games. Instead of the famous jump-to-defeat style, you throw vegetables picked from the ground. Like in the original Mario Bros. game, there were POW blocks, but with a stark difference:Instead of being in the air to hit, it was on the ground and had to be thrown. (Also, instead of flipping enemies over, it eliminated them immediately.) Instead of transforming into Fire Mario on your third power-up, you stay the same but you have an extra health point. It still made the game unique, so I give it an extra point for that.





Story: 8/10



SMB2 USA has a story going like this: Mario is having a dream in which the people of Sub-Con, the land of dreams, need help because an evil frog-king, Wart, has put them under an evil spell. When Mario wakes up he tries to clear his mind by talking to Luigi. Then, they go on a picnic with Princess Toadstool and Toad on a mountain, where they find a cave. Suprisingly, there are stairs leading up a seemingly never-ending path. When they reach the top, they find a door. Once they open it, POOF! They are instantly in Sub-Con!

The story is pretty good, like every game's story should be, and like everything else in this game, it is different from the other Mario games, such as the fact you play in Subcon instead of in the Mushroom Kingdom, and that the primary villan is Wart rather than Bowser.



Graphics: 9/10



Why am I giving a NES game like this a high rating? Because you can compare it with the 1st Super Mario Bros. game. In 1, the graphics were made out of pixel blocks. In 2, the graphics are much smoother. In 1, you could not properly tell out Mario's (or Luigi's) head. In 2, their faces are detailed. In 1, Luigi was nothing more than a palette change of Mario. In 2, he's taller, looks younger, and has a floaty jump compared to Mario's normal jump!

Difficulty: 9/10

This game is a bit tough for people at first, but as time passes, it becomes easier to do the things required. For example, the main 2 ways to defeat an enemy are plucking vegetables from the ground and picking up the enemy itself to throw at another. After a bit of practice, it becomes easier to throw by measuring distance.


Overall: 8/10

This game is pretty cool because of its levels, the enemies, and mostly its originality!

Available in the Wii Shop Channel for: 500 Wii Points

The Lost Poop/ The Last Poop Reviewed On This Blog

Yep, it's teh last one!







NOTE: NOT FOR THE PEOPLE WHO ARE EASILY FRIGHTENED BY MOST WORDS BLOCKED OUT OF AMERICAN T.V SHOWS IMPORTED AND MADE FROM/IN JAPAN



In this poop, I would like to say that Mario's head is an evil koopa wizard. And I can say that, because it's the title!








Mario's Final Review

Where I was last week in 2 words

On vacation.

Ulp.... (A.K.A: lolwut?)

Well, Mario saw my review and he left. So, I guess that means no more Poop videos.... Except for one more that Mario reviewed before leaving.

Review 4 (YOUTUBE POOP MONTH SPECIAL) : Hotel Mario

This will be the last Youtube Poop review!
This review's highlights: Gameplay, Voice Acting, Story


Okay. We've seen Philips mess things up with our favorite sword-wielding hero, Link, but how will they smash it up for Mario? Let's check.


Gameplay: 8/10

For a Philips game, the gameplay isn't so bad. In this game, the objective is to close all of the doors of the hotel you are in. There are different floors in the hotel (which you CAN see) which can be reached by going through an elevator. In early levels, the elevators will send you straight to the next floor. But in later parts, you'll have to figure out where the elevators will take you to! A video game HAS to have enemies if there is an ending. That's where Koopa Troopas, Goombas and the Koopalings come in. The enemies will try to open the doors as soon as you open them, so you'll have to get rid of them quick! As with most Mario games, you also have the ability to become Fire Mario to get rid of enemies without touching them. The gameplay would have made Hotel Mario an okay game, but unfortunately Philips had to screw it up with...

Voice Acting: 2/10

They just ruined their chances at making a good game with this. Seriously. The one thing that makes me say this is Princess Toadstool's (as she was known by back then) voice. She absolutely sounds NOTHING like a princess. In fact, she sounds like she was voiced by a man (like Miss Piggy is, except much, much less fitting)! As for Mario and Luigi's voices, I can't blame Philips because at the time they looked a bit older.


Story: 3/10

Ahem. Let me sum this up in a bit. Mario and Luigi are walking to see the princess who has invited them for a picnic. When they arrive to the spot, though, Bowser has left a note saying that he and the Koopalings have captured the princess, and dares them to find her. So then Mario goes to all of the hotels and defeats the Koopalings while seeing the princess who always vanishes until they reach Bowser's castle. Once Mario defeats Bowser, he rescues the princess and they finally go have their picnic.

P.S: All 3 of them call you the "best player ever!".


So that was Hotel Mario, a game that Phillips could have released without the story and voice acting, but just haad to mess up.


See ya next time!

Review 3 (YOUTUBE POOP MONTH SPECIAL) :Mario teaches typing 2

There is something wrong here. Giant octopuses guarding ships which may contain treasure don't live in a river. Why does Mario look like he's covered in poop in the first cutscene? How can he not know how to spell "koopa" when he's faced OVER NINE THOUSAAAND!!!!!!! of them in the past? Why is Bowser not even seen in his own castle? And one more thing... Why would Mario need YOUR help to get the 3 pieces of a magical typewriter which will blow up Bowser's castle for no apparent reason by becoming a great typist, if 2 of the pieces are right in front of him and the last is in a slow-flowing stream right in front of him where he could just get that piece right in front of him but instead decides to wait until the piece drifts down near said octopus? You'll be wondering these questions and more if you play this game.



Story: WEEIRD

...You seriously want to know? Okay. The story begins when Mario and Luigi are walking to Peach's castle. They come across Bowser's castle (which has hills with mouths and eyes that spit out letters behind it) and find a typewriter. For no reason, it says "DESTROY TE CASSLE O' BOWSAH!" (not really) and Mario decides to type in the magical message, even though he has a level of illiteracy high enough that nobody but YOU can cure. The typewriter blows up into 3 pieces. Mario could have just left Bowser and his poor Koopa Troopas alone. But noooo. He has to become a great typist, collect all 3 pieces of the typewriter and nearly kill Bowser by blowing up his castle. AND IT'S ALL BECAUSE YOU OFFERED TO HELP MARIO!


Art: WEEERDER

This section of my review will be shorter, but will say more. 0_0 says Mario's face when the typewriter blows up, even when the typewriter said it would blow up. 0_0 says Mario's face when the typewriter spits out a piece of paper saying,"DESTROY TE CASSLE O' BOWSAH!1!!!11!!". And :) says MARIO's head.


The Disembodied Head of Mario: Demented, 1-upping, peppy, creepy, etc.

Inbetween each cutscene, Mario's Head will be saying... Well... I won't review because you could already guess what I was thinking if you read these quotes:

"Can I sing a song for you?"
"...And 3! Weee....."
"Thank you for starting me up!"
"Imma bet you can't do this! Weeee....."
"That-a makes me so happy, I'm-a light headed! Weeee!"
"IIIIIII AIN'T GOT NO BODY!!!!!!!!!!"
"Heeheehee. Heeeheeeheeeheehee. Weee! Haha." (How many times does he say "Weee"?)
"That was Grey!"
"That is my impression of American advertising!"
"Hey, Luigi! It's-a time for you to (die)!"
"When I kiss the princess...."
"Watch out for phalling rocks!"
"Oh, look! It's-a Mario's Expert Express!"
"When the moon hits your eye, like a big pizza pie, that's amore (a morray)... Get it? A morray eel? Heeheeheeheehee.... I say the funnie."
"If you ready, GO for it!"

"Imma going to fly for you! Vroom...Vroom...Vroom... (crash lands) Ow. I hit my nose!"
"Welcome to the outside world!"
"You'll be typing WHOLE WORDS now!"
"I wonder if there's a hidden treasure down there!"
"Boy, look at that keyboard. I bet you're going to type on it! Heeheehee!"
"Hmm! Oh. Nice computer you've got there. Can I have it?
"Hmm! You have a nice place-a here!"
"Mario's Smash and-a Dash!"
"Hey, anyone got a diving board?"
"Hey, who's that behind you? Made you look, made you look, heeheeheeheehee!"
"Oh, boy! Finally, I'm-a get to move on the ground! Movin' on the ground, movin' on the ground...Heeheeheeheehee."
"Hey, don't leave me all alone! Hey! Where is everybody? COME BACK!"
____________________________________________
I could put WAY more quotes, but I think you've got the picture. I give this game a high rating. You know why? 'Cause III AIN'T GOT NO BODY (well, actually because we all love/hate him.)!

Oh, no!

The Mario head has fallen, and he can't get up!


.... Oh.

Randomness Ahoy!

P.S: Cuz' I wanna.
P.S.S: See ya later!

IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAAAND!!!!

Today, we will have another poop featuring a VERY used meme. Known first by fans of Dragon Ball Z, Vegeta spouted a line that inspired poops. Here is one of those poops.

This poop's creator is... :mario9090777

Mario Head's Review

Review 2 (YOUTUBE POOP MONTH SPECIAL):Link:The Faces of Evil (CD-I)

This review's highlights are: Art and Voice Acting

Okay. About the only 2 things that are good about this game is that it could be used for pooping and that it was made in 1993. Why is that a good thing? Because there weren't any games that acually HAD voice actors and cinematic cutscenes other than these crummy games. It's too bad that the voice actors and art themselves weren't half good.

Voice Acting: 2/10

How bad can Phillips get? Some cutscenes, such as one where Lupay says "I spy with my eye, someone who must DIE!" are laughable, and others, such as one where Link indentifies a Gohma and gets a sword for no apparent reason from a fisherman who sounds terrible (even though he was already carrying one) are just too horrible for words.

Art:4/10

The art in the cutscenes, for one thing, look like they were made in Microsoft Paint. Link was drawn by different animators for different cutscenes, so in some of them he looks different. In some he has HUGE olive eyes with eyelashes. In some he has beady little eyes and pure brown hair. And in some, he actually looks normal, but his mouth can sometimes get big.

Even though this review is pretty short, this is really enough reason to not play this game. If you don't believe me, just look at this close-up of CD-i Ganon:

Yup. So I'm doing you a favour by telling you to stay away from this game. The voice actors are amateurs, the art is weird-looking, and the the game itself can actually be funny when it's not supposed to be. I rate this game a 2.9.

Oh, yeah, by the way....



From ytmnd.
See ya next time!

I wonder what's for dinner?

If you have been sleeping under a rock for the last 1 year (Happy anniversary, Youtube Poop!), you wouldn't know this quote. But poopers and viewers alike know this famous sentence spoken under the words of KING HARKINIAN! Now here's one of (if not) the first Zelda CD-I poop, featuring... You guessed it, Dinner!

Mario Head's Review

Youtube Poop Month!

Well, sorry that I've only posted up one review. But I'll make it up with a theme month: Youtube Poop month! If you don't know what a youtube poop is, it is a remix of certain video games made back in the 1990's which all have cutscenes (Occasionally from the 2000's). The "poopers" (as they are called) use these cutscenes to create humorous videos for entertainment. Some video games include:

• Hotel Mario
• Link:The Faces Of Evil
• Zelda:The Wand Of Gamelon
• Mario Teaches Typing 2
• Super Smash Bros. Brawl

Also, there are a few T.V shows used for pooping. Most used are:

• Street Fighter cartoon
• Sonic the Hedgehog
• Super Mario World

Finally, there are even ads used for pooping, like:

• Volvic ad
• Ron Stewart ad (dunno which product he was advertising)
• Lifecall ad

Now, about the blog. Each week I will be giving reviews on video games that have been pooped, and at the end of each of my posts until the end of June, I will add a youtube poop. Speaking of that, I have someone who will state his opinions of each poop: Ladies and gentlemen, please clap your hands for the floating disembodied head of MARIO!

Credit goes to Toadtitan for clips

Earthbound/Mother 2 Links and Pictures

Well, since I totally forgot about last week's review, here are some pictures and links to sites about EarthBound! I hope this fills it in :)

EarthBound Pictures:

Credits go to Earthbound Central

"And, if you look to your left, you will see a photo guy

who appears out of nowhere and annoyingly takes

pictures of innocent kids who just might beat us up in

a few seconds!"

Credits go to EarthBound Central

"Somebody's gonna pay for this..."

Credit goes to EarthBound Central

"Paula? Paula??? PAULA?!??!?!?!?!?"

Wait.. Who is that in the Final Starman's visor?

This is the HUGE boxart for the game.

EarthBound Links

1. http://www.starmen.net/: The world's strongest Earthbound community!

2. http://www.geocities.com/ebmaniac/about.html Another site which is

now defunct.

3.http://www.angelfire.com/pa4/ebjunk/earthbound64/index.html/ Another defunct site.

4.http://djeu.8m.com/EBtest.html Not really a site, but a very neat personality test.

5.http://www.ebipm.net/enc/ An Earthbound news site

Well, I hope that later I can also add videos to this, too!

Review 1: Earthbound (MOTHER 2)

Earthbound was a game for the SNES released in 1994 in Japan as MOTHER 2, a sequel to the Japanese-only game known as MOTHER. Since its release in the NTSC region, it has become a fan favorite everywhere! Since 2000, gamers have created their own hacks of this game, and have also released tools to the public to create their own hacks with. Let's see how this game stacks up against other SNES games.



Music: 10/10

The music in this game is..... FANTASTIC! There are a lot of great battle themes in this game. The Kraken music will really get you moving, and the Weird Enemy music really fits. Some of the music is techno-style, others are a bit creepy, and others happy. There is one other thing I would like to say about this game's music: none of it is out of place. The music when fighting the (very) creepy final boss has a white ghost tone sound while in his second form, Eight Melodies (A.K.A Smiles and Tears) has a touching theme that plays while Ness, the main character, remembers his past, and when all is said and done, a relaxing theme (Because I Love You) can be heard throughout the cities.





Graphics: 8.7/10



A lot of people say that the graphics are the worst part of the game. I respectfully disagree. How? Well, the game may not have Final Fantasy graphics, but as with the music, it's all in place. The bustling cities (Onett, Fourside) have sharp graphics while the peaceful cities (Twoson, Happy-Happy Village) have calm ones.Some people might try to compare the graphics to today's, but no one really should. In its time, it actually might have had average graphics. Ten years have passed. Give the graphics a break!



Story: 10/10



In a year when all RPGs were set in the mythical time of knights, faeries, and dragons, one game broke all of the laws of RPGs... Yep, you guessed it, that game is EarthBound! The story begins in the suburbs of Onett. Ness, an average kid with an average home and an average life is sleeping soundly in his bed when he is woken up by the CRASH! of a meteorite. Knowing that she can't stop him, Ness' mom lets him investigate the meteorite, but Ness comes home without a glimpse. Later on at night, everything changes when Ness' neighbour, Pokey, knocks on the door and says that his brother, Picky, is missing. After finding Picky, the three start to head home, but stop when a blinding flash of light appears from the meteorite. Out of the meteorite comes a bee-like creature called Buzz Buzz who comes from the future. Buzz Buzz explains that the reason that he came was to warn the three (Ness in particular) that the future has been destroyed by Giygas, the Universal Cosmic Destroyer, but that there is still hope. He says that the Apple of Enlightenment has predicted that four kids will team up to defeat Giygas, and that Ness is one of them! You might be able to guess what happens next...



Difficulty: 9.5/10



This game isn't too difficult... Well, maybe it wouldn't be, if there were no battles! That is the real difficulty factor in this game, trying to get past all of the pesky enemies. You can see all of them on the overworld screen, meaning that you can avoid them, but that can be really hard when they are SERIOUSLY tiny or if you're stuck in a tight spot (literally). Since the general way to level up is to defeat enemies, you just might be in a tight spot somewhere in the game.



Gameplay: 10/10



The gameplay is kinda different from regular RPGs because instead of just talking to a specific person when you have an item, you have to use the item itself. Also, in battle, there is a rolling HP meter, which means that if you are hit by an attack that might get you a game over, you still have a chance to heal yourself before the meter drops to 0. Other than that, though, the battles are pretty standard.



Overall: 9.5/10



This game is a really great game, and I recommend it for everyone on earth (pun not intended). It's fun, also has a sad side to it, and will want you asking for more. However, some people give this game a bad review, and one even rated it a 1/10. I think these people really need to slap their heads and say, "WHAT WAS I THINKING?!?!?!" Anyways, all in all, Earthbound is more than fantastic. It's Earthbound.

First Post

Woohoo! My blog has been set up at last!

Judging from the title, you can probably guess that this is a blog dedicated to reviewing old school video games, from the Atari era, to the Video Game crash of 1983, to the great NES and SNES era. I'll probably update the site every week or so (or maybe even less), but it's kind of hard reviewing with less information on the games.This site was made so people who viewed this could get the information on long-past games and see what they were like. If some of these are popular enough, they might even end up on the Virtual Console! But anyways, let's start this blog!


P.S

Feel free to comment, but know that every comment will be moderated!

P.S.S

Also feel free to comment on suggestions for future reviews. Remember, the game must had to have been released before the year 2003!